Night inspiration and giving.

Hi guys! :D I know I know it's been a while since my last post like…4 months lol I'm such a baddie. :p Anyway this is probably the only time I've ever felt this inspired this summer so let's savor the moment shall we? :]]

So what I've been up to. That's a lot. I've been busy trying to stay in my course because now I'm on probation due to low grades but it's all good with my 3.17 QPI :D. This summer has also been pretty hectic what with 4 1/2 hours of class everyday and all, not to mention the IDK how many birthdays my block organized :]]. Everyone seems to be turning 18 this year, which makes them old haha :]] and me oldER =_=

But all these are besides the point, I type right now because of this thought that has been running though my mind and that thought is a seemingly simple thing: the act of giving. By giving, I'm not limiting it to presents, money, food, etc. I speak also about love, effort, time, and the like. I've been thinking about the reasons why people give in the first place. Is it because they want to seem like a decent member of society? Is it because they were taught that way by their parents? Is it because they are after a reward through our ideology of utang na loob? Is it because we were told that we would suffer an eternity in a fiery abyss or a similar fate by our faith? (hehe see what I did thur?) What is it that drives some people to do what they do? To give what they have for the benefit of the other.  What makes a teacher get up each morning to teach his/her students? What drove heroes to do feats that could have ended them at the prime of their lives? Was it the glory? Was it necessity? I don't think so, though sometimes at the back of my mind I think otherwise.

When I was younger I used to do good deeds only because other people could see how good I was and build up a good reputation. I did it to please everyone with the thought that maybe they would do the same for me during times I would struggle and needed help. In a way, I was what you could say "user friendly". However, along the lines of my childhood to my adulthood, I met simple people with extraordinary hearts driven by a passion to serve others. I heard stories of people who devoted their lives in order to better those that were devastated either by fate or the cruelty of others. I guess I was influenced by those and the people around me who didn't teach but showed me what it means to give for nothing. To give because we want to. Not because we were called to do it, not because other people were watching, not because we carry the name of a prestigious school, not because society calls upon us to be that way. They showed me true generosity and with that generosity, they showed how it is to truly love.

You might be asking: why so serious? To be honest, a lot of things have happened this past year and the only thing I can remember that helped me get through everything was the time, love and understanding the people around me gave. At times when my self esteem was reaching the negatives, they would always push it right back up. They would always be willing to give time to listen to my rantings.

This brings me back to the question of why they would do this for me. Obligation? Sympathy? I don't think so.

 The only explanation I can really think of is the thought of love. Not the kind with all that science-y stuff with endorphins and what other chemicals are released due to some random neurotransmitters. I'm talking about that mysterious force within people that drives them to offer a part of their being to heal another.
To sacrifice.
You may call it your conscience or whatever you like but it is this mysterious force that drives me to reflect on what I do for other people because right now I am at a point of confusion.
I don't know if I give to people because I TRULY want to
or because I feel that they can help me in the future.
All I know is that I do so because that is what my heart tells me and I ask God everyday that I may grow to understand what really is this fire in my soul prodding me to do what some people would set out to call foolish or weird things. All I can do is sing this song in my head. :)

Click Here :)

Been a while I know and I'm typing this when I'm not even at a hundred percent.

It's been a very long time since my last post (more than a month OMG). Well, that's mainly due to the fact that I had life to handle and that my life isn't exactly what you would call very eventful. :| Anyway, a short summary of what I've done could be boiled down to a few words, namely: Study, Tests, Death, costly triumph, massacre, heart, and dog (lol). Pardon my rather dry sense of humor as I'm not quite myself at the moment. Anyway, off to the main topic of my post for today…

Waiting.

.

..

...

....

.....

Waiting is hard. Be it waiting for a cab that doesn't have a passenger, waiting for test scores to come out, waiting for your instant noodles to finally finish, or waiting for your slow ass friends who said that you would meet up at X time when they really meant (X+Y) time raised to the infinite power. DX All these situations basically boil down to the fact that you're waiting for something. What kills you isn't the amount of time that you have to wait, though this does help add to the stress, rather, it's the anticipation and expectation that something good will come your way. And when it doesn't, it just rips you apart as if a part of yourself just got torn to bits. I know this because I've experienced it……many many times. What I've learned from my parents and friends, as well as a little reflection myself, that worrying about those disappointments won't get you anywhere. All you can do is…

PUSH

ON

THROUGH

and with that, I think it has made me into a better person.

Forgive my crappy writing right now as I am out of practice and I don't have the luxury of time. Real life is calling right now with sleep as its medium so if you would, this would have to end this little post.

Words of Wisdom

I'll just repeat what I said in bold letters…

PUSH.

ON.

THROUGH.

Short post (Yes…it's a thing) Gloomy day turned bright, My aching foot.

Due to time constraints and a lack of more action, here is another short post (Trust me, it's gonna be a thing ;) ). So my day started pretty light with a semi free cut with English ( I know it's been that way for a while now). I say semi free cut because the whole period was devoted to consultations regarding our research paper D: . I took this time to do it early because…well…I felt like it? Continuing on we had a an awesome Lit class where we analyzed the movie "Hero" with Jet Li (Yes…my friends that movie is poetry). We also managed to get the topic we wanted to report on for next week which may be attributed to my mad jinxing skillz :p . In InTACT, we discussed how we would go about the our insertion into GK Bagong Silang (lol I said insertion).

My mood took a dump went it was Chem.It went southward and into the crapper because I didn't do quite well in my quiz and to top it off, I don't think I did so well in Math either. :/ Long story short: I got kinda down.

So there I was down in the dumps and waiting for an hour before I joined the Muay Thai team in training. During this quiet repose from the day that stuck a javelin into my confidence, I took the time to go to ARSAfest (WOOHOO!) which, for all those not familiar, is a week long event organized by the dormers for also a week long of fun :D . I joined my blockmates who were on their way to the dorms because, for the whole week at least, they could actually do that :p . I really enjoyed that. I don't know. Something about being with my blockmates and meeting up with the dormers lifted my spirits a bit so to all of you guys…THANKS! You don't know how much you guys helped me in that hour.

Thanks

Care of Deviantart.com

So after seperating from the group, I trained with the team in which I ended the session with a pretty beat up foot but hey, no pain no gain right? :p But then again…my foot's hurting like it got crushed by a car in grade school ( Oh wait…that actually happened. Same foot too. lol).

My precious foot

Words of Wisdom

For today, I thought that songs are also words of wisdom so here…

a Michael Bolton song and my LSS for a bit now.

ACET, Hell day ,and Family Guy :D

So today I got up after like 4 hours of sleep, due to the small reunion I had with my high school brothers <3, to go to Ateneo and check out the ACET results with my very nervous yet EXTREMELY excited little sister. We got to the school at about 7:30 in the morning and surprisingly there were fewer people there than we expected. I had met up with Rap, Micha and Jeth who were also going to check the results for siblings, godsiblings, etc. At 7:40, the truck carrying the results arrived and the people suddenly started to swarm the area like bees to a flower…in an arid desert. At 7:50, the cover over the results were torn and screams, shouts, and cries could be heard in all directions. We stayed there for a few minutes with the incessant sounds of joy,sadness, and disappointment growing louder. Finally we decided to get some breakfast at Pancake House both to lighten the mood and to compose ourselves (or rather my sister) from seeing the results.

That, so far, is how my day is unfolding as of now; the previous day, however, is a different story. The day started out quite well: me oversleeping, not shampoo-ing my hair, not applying wax to my hair,and going to school on an empty stomach. Yeah…I think my day was starting off quite nicely. Come 7:30, me and my English 12 classmates were getting ourselves ready for class only to find out that it was a free cut. Needless to say, my classmates were happy of the free time we would get because Lit was also a free cut. I can also honestly say that they were delighted to lug their laptops around the school for the added exercise and to wake up very early in the morning (topped maybe with a cold shower) to get used to the hustle and bustle of post academic life. We spent that free time watching Family Guy on my iPad (yes, I know what you're gonna say now SHUSH) and were laughing at how Peter reacted to drinking Red Bull.

Peter adding a secret ingredient to his home made Red Bull

 We also watched Despicable Me which was another laugh trip in itself. I then had a shift at DSWS for about an hour afterwhich I pretty much walked around A LOT and spent the last few moments before my 1:30 class faceplanted on the table at the DS office. I went into Chem class and guess what? it was a free cut :| . Given the opportunity most graciously bestowed upon me by the universe, I took this time to learn from my peers for the upcoming Math Long Test after the period. Thanks to Master Cheryl, Master Micha, and Master Mike, I can say that my brain was warmed up for hike it would take while carrying a ten ton weight…uphill. Anyway to make a long story short, I took the Math long test, got my brain raped, took my Lit midterms, got my brain masticated by poems about fish (yeah FISH) and went on my merry way to my classmates house for the high school reunion.

At the reunion, we all felt like we were in high school again; only some of us were buffer and had more lady friends (not me sadly. ;_;). We had a lot of fun there eating,drinking, talking about girls, drinking, reminiscing, drinking, playing with cards, peeing. It was a wonderful night. I face planted when I got home preparing myself for the impending trial I was about to face later in the day.

Seeing the ACET results posted made me think of how I got accepted in the Ateneo. It's already been officially a year after that event where I leaped in joy rejoicing how I would not go to the province to study (this is due to the fact that I only took 2 entrance tests, one for UP and the other for Ateneo; the UP one didn't work out so well with 60 unanswered questions ^_^;;). It made me think of how I've been faring in the school right now. It made me think of whether or not I'm earning my keep in terms of study and effort. It made me think of whether or not my slot in the course really did go to someone who deserved it. The answers to these questions have continued to evade me though I feel that I'm at their heels. 

For my final words, I'd like to say congratulations to all the ACET passers for this year. Don't rest on your laurels though and make sure you honor yourself and those who didn't make it by showing that you deserve that spot and working hard. To those who didn't make it or are going to try to appeal, remember that when one door closes, another opens and that if you truly want something, work for it and never give up. Once again, congratulations, stay positive, and keep fighting. :D

Words of Wisdom

When Life knocks you down, beat it with a stick and toss it over a cliff. ^_^

~Personal Quote

New study habits make me happy. Short post due to time pressure and required sleep.

Due to the return to school this last week, I have been quite busy with my school life; with all the the extra-curricular activities, orgs and academics. Of course my social life has also contributed to it's fair share of consuming my time; with friends, groupmates and crushes. <3 :p Anyway, to the point of this post which is basically for the sake of being able to post and for the continuing patronage of my 4 followers, X amount of visitors, and a countless amount of Anons which I am glad to say are now free to post comments (Yes, I know Imma bad blogger). 

This week I started my new life as a student; from the old, dreary, "patapon" me from the past decade, I burst into flames and from the ashes rose a slightly older me full of optimism and still a complete set of fingers after the New Year (OH YEAH!). I started doing my homework early which was quite a new concept to me as I only did so if:

1.  I knew it was going to be extremely long (extremely long = X>10)
2.  It meant a huge part of my grade.
3.  If I felt like it. (Occurs 1-2 times a year or whenever a large event is happening in which case I balance everybody's eagerness to party with an incredible enthusiasm at fulfilling my academic obligations)

Back to the point, I started with this new concept and it felt pretty good.YES, IT FELT GOOD. GAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! It felt nice to be responsible for a change and being able to at least feel a little productive. It was also a little nice to have some free time afterwards which I used up playing Tetris Battle on Facebook (So sue me it's quite addicting and I'm competative). This is definitely a lifestyle change that I want in my new 2011-2020 life (No, the world is not ending in 2012. Sorry guys but I'm still here so it probably won't happen ;) )

Anyway for now this will have to suffice. Forgive me if the topic seems a bit insipid and a wee bit…oh forget it…sorry if it's lame. I'm quite tired now after 6 hours of listing only the reagents of my prelab and working under time pressure. I'm sure I'll be able to post something during the course of the week; hopefully that post will have more substance and I'll have more time to prepare. In the mean time, stay tuned and take care of yourselves (It's only the first month >:)) )

Words of Wisdom

Thanks to Jian Magno for tagging me in this pic. <3

New Year. New Decade. New Start.

So here I am starting a blog since I got jealous of my other friends and have decided to join the bandwagon. >:) Another reason being to be able to vent some thoughts instead of keeping them plugged in until I burst into a fiery ball of annoyance for my friends. 

To start, my last Christmas of the decade was an unusual one; unusual because I didn't spend it in the province like I have for the past 10 years. : / It's also because we spent it in a fancy, fine dining restaurant in the heart of Makati. I must've eaten half a kilo of steak and a whole basket of bread. >.< Christmas Eve was pretty quiet from the scene I'm used to, which is a house with my family filled with the sounds of the T.V., the constant conversations of my titas, titos, and cousins. This Christmas, or rather last Christmas, we finished opening the gifts within 5 minutes; after which I played WoW 'til 6 am where my mom got mad at me for not sleeping. :| The rest of the day was spent complaining about the amount of beef that we consumed the previous evening because it was now stampeding down the narrow points of our bowels. >:))

I went to the province 2 days after Christmas, where me and my sister joined our 7 other cousins. I expected our stay there to be a pretty relaxed, slow-paced one…

I WAS WRONG.

For the next 3-4 days, I was not going to get a decent amount of sleep.

On the first day, I woke up at like around 4:30 in the morning to leave for Cagayan. We lined up for the barge and got across the bay. We then drove for one hour on the highway probinsya style, meaning we drove at around 100km/hr while dodging incoming traffic. In short, it was fun. We had breakfast at Iligan in a Jollibee. :) I wanted to meet up with Mike but…well…it was 7 in the morning. :p I can't remember the rest of the trip because I fell asleep. :( We arrived in Cagayan at around 10:30 so I had 3 or so hours before I met up with Aimee. (HAI AIMEE!!!) We met met up at Missy Bon Bon (That's right blockmates be jealous) and we proceeded to take a tour of the city, well…actually just the mall but hey, it was big. We also took a cab going to Ateneo de Cagayan but got stuck in traffic, our cab driver then proceeded to let out a "Holy Shit" at which point me and Aimee were quite surprised at the sophistication of his cussing vocabulary (no offense; just in case this is a disclaimer).  Also as a side note,  we saw an interesting flier on a dilapidated old booth on the way to the school that said Chris Uy for SK chairwoman and we got a few chuckles and giggles (HAI TOO CHRIS!); we didn't get a picture though which make me sad. :( We also didn't get to go into the school which made me even more sad :( :( so me and Aimee decided to have some coffee after which Aimee's mom gave me a lift back to the lodge we were staying in (Thanks tita! :D).

The next day we woke up at around 5:30 in the morning to go to Bukidnon and go Ziplining(?). It was a long ride and a bumpy one too. We travelled through different kinds of plantations such as Pineapples and Tomatoes (LOL). The rest of the day was pretty much just soaring though the air with cables and racing through different towns and cities going home (you know your average everyday fun stuff :>).

Here's one of the Pineapples I saw, I call it Karl's baby

…and I'll post this picture just for kicks.

On the third day, we went to Lakewood…Lake(?) so my cousins could go kayaking. I opted out of it because I don't like taking a bath just to take a bath afterward. :| I did get a good view of the lake from Nanay Gillie's house (sorry if my spelling is wrong family members). It was quite relaxing given that her house was on the wall of the mountain overlooking the lake. :p It had a real rural feel to it. Since that day was also New Year's Eve, I think that it counts as two days and it is assumed that my sleep was complete crap (though I did sleep for a good 10 hours).

Just beautiful…

Anyway, during my stay there I did a lot of thinking. I thought about these questions: What did I do the past decade? What am I gonna do in 2011 that I'm actually gonna achieve? How am I going to yank my grades from the devil's ass? and What's gonna be different from the 2000-2010 me from the 2011-2020 me? (I'll probably be older I know) Needless to say, I have plenty of work to do and much, much more to learn, but with my buddies and my family (yes you too Shobe >:)) ) I think I'll pull though just as I've pulled though those other times I can't recall. :p

I'll blog more later. Right now, I'm addicted to Tetris Battle because all the cool kids are doing it. I'll probably blog more about Ozamiz. Stay tuned. :D

Words of wisdom

Quite true…